I’ve made it to the 25 week mark! I think it’s interesting how I still think of it is “making it another week”… I would bet that women who didn’t have a miscarriage would just think of it as another step along the way. I have to say, though, things are going very well for me now. My body is most definitely visibly pregnant now, and I am loving it! I love how I can still wear most of my old shirts and sweaters, but they are definitely belly-hugging and they certainly don’t hang the way they used to.
I am pleased to report that although I have put on about 15 pounds, it seems to be all belly and boobs. I can’t even button up my jacket anymore! A few weeks ago, I couldn’t do up the bottom half of the buttons because my belly had gotten too big, but today on my walk, I noticed that the button would probably pop off if I tried to keep the top half of my jacket done up! I have gone up two bra sizes already, so I wonder how big they’ll get when I start breastfeeding… Sometimes M and I laugh at how they’ve gotten so big, they almost look fake.
I’ve been very diligent about trying to avoid stretch marks. I apply a special massage lotion every morning and night. I really enjoy this ritual of putting lotion on my tummy. I think of the little baby inside of me when I am applying it, imagining where it’s head or it’s hands may be in there, and thinking about how much it’s growing to be causing this big belly of mine! I love to look at my tummy after I’ve put the cream on, all big and round and shiny from the lotion. I know some women feel like they hate their bodies when they start getting larger, because pregnancy has changed their formerly fit and trim bodies, but I love it. I love my pregnant body. I love seeing how it’s growing and how my tummy is about the size of a soccer ball now. It sticks almost straight out.
One thing I’ve been watching carefully is my belly button. I’ve read that it can “pop” at any time now. Honestly, that’s one thing I’m not really looking forward to. I don’t want my belly button to stick out! I don’t like how it looks…. I just hope that if it does pop, that it at least hangs on until we get back from our trip. Yes – we’re going to Hawaii next month!! I’m going to go for it and still wear a bikini 🙂 I will have to buy a new one, though, because all of the ones I own are the string top style, and that just isn’t going to hold the ladies in. I will have to get the kind that has the band at the bottom for more support.
I am still kind of stunned that I am nearly at the end of my second trimester. We’ve come such a long way since those dark days of November. There is hope. There is life after miscarriage.
Technology is a wonderful thing. Back in my grandmother’s day, they didn’t even do ultrasounds. At around the 5 month mark, you could start to hear baby with a regular stethoscope, so you would get a listen then, but otherwise you didn’t get a peek at baby until the big day. So, she was blown away when my uncle showed her a recording of our 3D ultrasound.
I had heard of 3D ultrasounds before, and a couple of people I know had gotten them done during their pregnancies, but the images were always a bit fuzzy, and it was a little creepy to be honest. However, during one of my many routine blood tests (not fun for someone who is scared of needles), the lab tech told me how she and a friend had bought a 3D ultrasound for someone’s shower gift. The mother-to-be absolutely loved it. So, it got me thinking about them again and we decided that we would go ahead and book one. We were especially looking forward to the “heartbeat bear” that we would get as a keepsake. The clinic would take a recording of baby’s heartbeat and then put it into a teddy bear, so we could squeeze the bear and hear baby’s heart whenever we wanted! It has quickly become my most favorite sound in the world! We could also have a few people in the room with us, so we could all see baby on the big screen TV. They include a free web broadcast as well, so that my out of town family could log in and watch the ultrasound live with us.
Since we don’t want to know the sex of the baby, it was recommended that we book the ultrasound for somewhere between 20-25 weeks. We booked ours for the weekend after our regular ultrasound which was scheduled at 21 weeks. Part of me still had that bit of fear, which I believe will never go away until I am holding my precious baby in my arms, that we would go to that diagnostic ultrasound and find out that something was wrong. It didn’t matter that I could feel baby moving and kicking most days, and usually on quite a set schedule, I still had those terrible thoughts that once again they might not find a heartbeat. Having the 3D ultrasound done AFTER that was important to me because if something had gone wrong, at least then it would have been possible to cancel. I couldn’t bear the thought of having our entire family on hand to discover the tragedy.
As it was, though, it turned out to be a wonderful experience. Our parents and M’s siblings were on hand, and we all settled into the very comfortable room to do the ultrasound. It was a bit odd to lie down and lift up my shirt so that everyone could see my belly, but I got over it pretty quickly. Baby definitely put on a show for us! I was thrilled to see how active baby was, moving it’s arms around and opening and closing it’s mouth. We all giggled when it looked like baby was flexing it’s muscles, giving us a gun show and kissing it’s bicep. Already, everyone is in love!
Baby was very flexible and was being a bit stubborn, though – it’s legs were folded up in front of it’s face the whole time, making it a bit harder for the tech to get a clear image of the face. We did get some fantastic photos, though (more than 150 of them!) and in some of them baby’s face is amazingly detailed. I can tell baby has daddy’s chin, and it looks like it’s got my nose. I love looking at the pictures because it makes it so much more real! Every time baby kicks, I can vividly see that little body in there, that little face and precious hands and feet.
It’s really happening this time.